Some random thoughts that I've had while sitting around my apartment watching TiVoed "The Daily Show":
When you forget your Jewel Card, everything you buy could have been discounted; when you bring your Jewel Card, nothing you buy can be discounted.
You learn a lot about Jeff by knowing that the last place I look for my coat is in the closet.
I worry about cancer. Not in a personal way, but in a general way.
It's only cheesy if you don't mean it.
One day I'll have an idea that will save me from the 9-to-5 drudgery that I'm currently living; today is not that day.
Sometimes I think that Bob Dylan is given too much credit, but then I immediately think I'm not giving him enough credit.
Memory can work for you and against you at the exact same time. Thinking about this makes my head hurt.
I am extremely picky about many things. The tissue I use is not one of those things.
I really like to dance around my room while listening to my music collection. Is there any way I can get paid for that?
My dad is a Senator. My uncle is an astronaut. That makes me both interesting and boring at the same time.
Every year I think that I should send out Christmas cards to people, but then I realize that only married people and old people do that.
Sometimes being the bigger person just doesn't give you the satisfaction you were looking for.
We need more songs like the Black Eyed Peas' "Let's Get Retarded."