Seeing four naked men in the locker room huddle around an iPod nano really speaks to the power of gagetry over the male mind.
Handjobs are underrated.
The clock is ticking. You'll be dead sooner than you think.
I'm pretty sure I fart a lot more than the average human. I may even be setting some kind of farting record that I'm unaware of.
Waiting is the hardest part. Especially at amusement parks.
If you call my phone and I don't answer, it's because I hate you.
The hardest part of being in a relationship is buying gifts.
What you are doing right now will probably give you cancer.
TiVo has made me realize that my roommate watches a lot of crap TV.
Iron Chef, however, is delightful.
Ignorance is a powerful tool.
Can I get a clear wristband that reads, "WRISTBAND"?
Water is both refreshing and deadly.