Monday, April 07, 2008


Dee and I went to get groceries tonight. We were smart enough to have dinner beforehand so that we weren't shopping on an empty stomach. We made a list and planned to stick to it. Unfortunately, we made the mistake of shopping on a no dessert stomach. I don't have much of a sweet tooth, but Dee needs something sweet to top off her meals. It doesn't have to be anything big - often it's just a small piece of chocolate - but she does need it. Today we did not have that.

At the grocery store we stayed pretty close to our list, but I did leave her unattended a couple times. Once, her father called to ask about which computer he should buy and the other time I ran off to grab some pasta that we missed in the first aisle. In those two brief absences, Dee managed to grab some Oreos, two half gallons of ice cream and some chocolate Pirouline.

As we got to the register, I realized all of the goodies she had added to our cart. So did the guy at the register. The guy at the register also decided that he was Dave Letterman and decided to do a running commentary on the items we bought. The exchange went something like this:

Register Guy: Looks like you guys went shopping hungry.
Jeff: Nah, we just haven't been in a while.
RG: Well, I'm seein' ice cream, cookies...
Dee: We just like ice cream.
RG: Wow. That's some cheap salmon. Must be something wrong with it.
Jeff: (unsure) Ha.
RG: Yeah, good price. Sure you want it?
Dee: What did he say?
Jeff: Yeah, just bag it.
RG: Oh man, I'm coming over to your place.
Jeff: Just bring some beer.
RG: I'm not 21.
Jeff: Then you're not invited.
Girl Bagging: Oh, damn. That's cold.
RG: Man, that juice looks weird.
Jeff: It just needs a shake and it will be fine.
RG: That stuff is weird.
Jeff: It's just settled.
Dee: What are you talking about?
Jeff: Nothing
RG: You guys must like vegetables. That's a lot of peas.
Jeff: Yep. It's not all cookies and ice cream.
RG: But that's a lot of peas.
Jeff: You can't buy just one.
RG: Hey, look at this...
Jeff: Can we just wrap it up here? We need to get home.
RG: Right. Here we go.
Dee: What's going on?

As you can see, the last thing I needed was a smart-ass checking me out and making a comment about every little thing. I already had Dee sneaking in all sorts of bad-for-you treats so I was in no mood to deal with some twelve year old commenting on my grocery haul.

Or maybe I'm just a grumpy old man.

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