As I mentioned during the Beijing Olympics, I’m not a big Olympics guy. Something is different this year, though. I’m into it. Maybe I’m getting soft in my old age. Maybe the winter events are more interesting to me. Maybe chanting U-S-A doesn’t feel as evil now that Bush is no longer President. Whatever it is, I’m excited about the Olympics for once. Mostly.
Unfortunately, the Winter Games includes figure skating and ice dancing. Wake me up when they figure out how to incorporate guns or nudity. Even without guns or nudity, figure skating and ice dancing are two of the most popular events. I don’t get it. I want to see mostly unprotected men and women flying down icy tracks at unbelievable speeds. I want to see people ski for miles and then try to hit impossibly small targets with rifles. I want to see people strap two-by-fours to their feet and fly 100 meters through the air. I want big dudes smacking a tiny little puck around. Give me speed and danger not dancing and sparkles.
Some other random thoughts about the Winter Olympics so far:
Did everyone forget that the Opening Ceremony was always boring before Beijing?
How do the lugers keep those Cobra Commander visors from fogging up?
Why are there tiny little pine trees all over the ski jump?
Bobsled would be more fun if they widened the track and let them go down two at a time.
Just like NASCAR, people watch short track speed skating for the crashes.