Monday, August 13, 2012

Thoughts On the Olympics

I don’t love the Olympics.  I’m not really interested.  However, I’m not completely disinterested.  If Dee is watching, I’ll sit and watch.  Unless there is preseason football on.

Why has everyone forgotten that the Beijing opening ceremonies were the exception?  The opening ceremonies are always lame and weird.

Michael Phelps has won a ton of Olympic medals.  I don’t think that having the most medals necessarily makes you the greatest Olympian.  He just has the most opportunity.  There are about a thousand different swimming events.  He’s a really good swimmer.  If they had the 100 Meter Arms Behind Your Back, the 100 Meter Arms Over Your Head, the 100 Meter Arms Flapping Out To the Side, the 100 Meter Fingers In Your Ears and the regular 100 Meters and then the 200 meter equivalents of those races, Usain Bolt would have 22 medals in the past two Olympics (and that’s if they don’t do the same variations on the relays).  Phelps just picked the right sport to pile up medals.

Also, swimming is boring.

The NBC gymnastics commentators really wanted us to hate the Russian gymnasts.  They called them divas more than teenage girls should ever be called divas by adults.  It’s not like these girls demanded to use their own apparatuses instead of the ones provided by London.

Let’s stop being disappointed when the U.S. Men’s Basketball team doesn’t win every game by 40.  Other countries have NBA players now.  In fact, many countries have several NBA players.

We should probably stop calling them the Dream Team, though.

If you like you some nice butts, you are a big fan of sprinters.

I like me some nice butts.

I would like to congratulate the human race on figuring out a way to make falling a sport.

Speaking of diving, the scariest part for me wouldn’t be jumping off the super high platform.  It would be the part where you’ve just spent all your energy and breath twisting and turning in the air and now you’re at the bottom of a pool with no air in your lungs.

Pole Vault.  NO.

When I start watching volleyball (the regular indoor kind) I think, “Man, why isn’t this sport more popular?”  Then I lose interest and wander off.

I watched BMX simply for the crashes.  How’s that for Olympic spirit?

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