Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Scared of a Bag of Chips

Sometimes I'll come home to find a brand new bag of chips in the cabinet. I'll see that bag of chips and be all, "Hell yeah. Those are my favorite chips. My wife loves me and wants me to be happy." I'll grab the bag of chips and start to open them and then stop…

Oh wait. Are these for some party that we're having that Dee told me about but I totally didn't pay attention to because I was immediately annoyed by the fact that we're having some sort of party I'll have to clean up after? Maybe? I don't remember. I should text her. No, texting her about chips is dumb. I don't need chips, anyway. No, I do need these chips. I'm definitely going to text her. No, I'm going to check the calendar first. Hmmm, there's nothing on the calendar. I think I'm good. Oh wait, is she taking them somewhere for some ladies' thing she's going to? I don't know, I never pay attention. Damn. 

…then I just open the chips and eat half the bag. You know, because I'm a shoot first ask questions later kind of guy.

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